While I wait for the Turkey to thaw… my mind has a chance to contemplate on the nature of cold.
You see, I grew up in the great white north, on top of an ice covered mountain where summer was an opportunity to see green, but warmth was not a guarantee, a constant, or even a thought on most days. This taught me to appreciate the sun when it began to thaw dirt that had been frozen all winter long. It taught me to love the warmth.
The thing about the cold is that it is cold. It changes your body, it gives you an appreciation for warmth that is very difficult to describe fully. Growing up in Idaho nearly every evening was the perfect time for a warm bath. If you found a hot springs you most definitely wanted to take the chance to get into it. Having a fire place had meaning, drowning yourself in a sea of comfy warm blankets was a pleasure. Nearly every activity growing up was a lesson in how to stay warm and comfortable (even recess in school wholly dedicated to running around non-stop)
Now … back to Arizona. It's already warm… always. It's actually very hot, always. So these scout skills I was taught on how to build a fire … become useless when you live in fire. There's no comfort in crawling under 100 blankets when you're only escaping one heat for another. The absolute heaven that is a hot bath … loses all of the savor when you're escaping the heat into a hot bath. So Arizona has stolen the heat from me… and replaced it with heat. It's like knowing that your child loves to have a candy bar once a week … then giving him 10,000 candy bars every day… the specialness of that candy bar goes away and pretty soon he dies from diabetes… or just learns to hate the candy bar.
"What'cha thinking about?" is the question… and the answer "oh… you know, everything."
Today is Sunday, a day for quiet reflection, scripture study, thoughtful meditation, a pleasant nap, and wonderful time with family.
This evening the children and I sat down to a video I had watched once upon a time.
It's funny how we can get caught up in 'real life' and, like a child with a video game, become oblivious to the things that really matter. I love video's like this, stories like this where someone has an honest question about who they really are, or where they will go when they die, or what the purpose of life is… and then how they find the answer.
I'm feeling all kinds of romantic tonight, close my eyes and can see a romantic dinner on the beach, dancing by moonlight against the waves. I want to write some poetry and lose myself in the feeling of warmth that comes from knowing that there's a light out there worth writing for.
I'm starting a business with my Brother… it's kind of a big deal, and as I face the Herculean efforts that will be involved in the not too distant future, I can't help but wonder if we can do that… if we can build that.
Blankets, there can never be too many blankets. One month ago I had one blanket on top of the bed… the original down comforter began to spread it's wings (or little feather bits) all over the place. So I started a crusade to fix what was wrong with my world… and in this case that happened to be blankets. It's been a month, and as most metaphors for my life goes, when I set out to accomplish something, I seem to succeed. I'm now comfortably buried under four very thick and new blankets, and I have to wonder if that's going to be enough, because I can do better. (mua ha ha)
Music is a big part of me, and being able to make music is as important to me as being able to fly is to a bird. (Except penguins and other non-flying birds, they don't know what they're missing!)
Side Note – I keep a list on my phone of ideas to write about, in case I'm every here at night with a blank slate and nothing on my mind… and I haven't had to reach into it once, which is sad because on that list are things like post the last 3 years of pictures from going to the ballet, My first attempt straightening my daughters hair, with pictures… a little discussion about the refiners fire… but instead I sit here and post cat videos. (lol, I've never posted a cat video here.)
The other day I had my pandora radio station playing, and heard a song I hadn't heard before. It was on one of the stations where I'm more picky about music… my initial impression was "This song has words!" Then I listened to the words, and I think you should too.
(I picked a cover because the original artist is a little bit country, and I'm a lot not.)
I'm learning that sometimes your blessings come from raindrops, and healing comes through tears… and I've had 1000 sleepless nights, and it's taught me more than I can even say.